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The Frumious Bandersnatch

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kitteh [Apr. 2nd, 2010|02:42 pm]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
[Current Location |Murry Hill]
[Current Music |old blue eyes]

There is no reason why this makes me laugh as much as it does.
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...... [Dec. 15th, 2009|08:57 pm]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
[Current Location |da Bay]

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Nobody loves the Moon Pies [Oct. 8th, 2009|06:19 pm]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
Southern astrological signs

Some people (especially Southerners) are pretty skeptical of horoscopes, and it has become obvious that what they need are their own “Southern” astrological signs.

OKRA (Dec 22 – Jan 20)
Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on the inside. Okras have tremendous influence. An older Okra can look back over his life and see the seeds of his influence everywhere. Stay away from Moon Pies.

CHITLIN (Jan 21 – Feb 19)
Chitlins come from humble backgrounds. A chitlin, however, can make something of himself if he’s motivated and has lots of seasoning. In dealing with Chitlins, be careful. They can erupt like Vesuvius. Chitlins are best with Catfish and Okra.

BOLL WEEVIL (Feb 20 – Mar 20)
You have an overwhelming curiosity. You’re unsatisfied with the surface of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior of everything. Needless to say, you are very intense and driven as if you had some inner hunger. Nobody in their right mind is going to marry you, so don’t worry about it.

MOON PIE (Mar 21 – Apr 20)
You’re the type that spends a lot of time on the front porch. It’s a cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon Pies. Big and round are the key words here. You should marry anybody who you can get remotely interested in the idea. It’s not going to be easy. This might be the year to think about aerobics. Or – maybe not.

POSSUM (Apr 21 – May 21)
When confronted with life’s difficulties, possums have a marked tendency to withdraw and develop a don’t-bother-me-about-it attitude. Sometimes you become so withdrawn, people actually think you’re dead. This strategy is probably not psychologically healthy, but seems to work for you. One day, however, it won’t work and you may find your problems actually running you over.

CRAWFISH (May 22 – June 21)
Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you’re always hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the mountains, the pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living room. You tend to be not particularly attractive physically, but you have very, very good heads.

COLLARDS (June 22 – July 23)
Collards have a genius for communication. They love to get in the “melting pot” of life and share their essence with the essence of those round them. Collards make good social workers, psychologists, and baseball managers. As far as your personal life goes, if you are Collards, stay away from Moon Pies. It just won’t work. Save yourself a lot of heartache.

CATFISH (July 24 – Aug 23)
Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, although one’s whiskers may cause problems for loved ones. You catfish are never easy people to understand. You prefer the muddy bottoms to the clear surface of life. Above all else, Catfish should stay away from Moon Pies.

GRITS (Aug 24 – Sept 23)
Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You like to huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits. You love to travel though, so maybe you should think about joining a club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese or gravy or bacon or butter or eggs. If you can go somewhere where they have all these things, that serves you well.

BOILED PEANUTS (Sept 24 – Oct 23)
You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man. Unfortunately, those who know you best – your friends and loved ones – may find that your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will probably affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you appear. You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because in a certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of life, you can be sure that people will always pull over and stop for you.

BUTTER BEAN (Oct 24 – Nov 22)
Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well with everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You’ve grown on the vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You can sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn’t have anything to do with Moon Pies.

ARMADILLO (Nov 23 – Dec 21)
You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you are actually quite gentle. A good evening for you? Old friends, a fire, some roots, fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You’re not concerned with today’s fashions and trends. You’re not concerned with anything about today. You’re really almost prehistoric in your interests and behavior patterns. You probably want to marry another Armadillo, but Possum is another somewhat kinky, mating possibility.
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internal climates [Oct. 8th, 2009|08:15 am]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
I like my horoscope for this week:
"The poet Stephen Mallarme wrote the following in a letter to a friend: "I don't know which of my internal climates I should explore in order to find you and meet you." I love that passage. It alludes to one of the central facts about the nature of reality: The quality of your consciousness is crucial in determining whether you'll be able to attract the resources that are essential to your dreams coming true. In order to get what you want, you have to work on yourself at least as hard as you work on the world around you. This is always true, of course, but it's especially true for you now, Aries."
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(no subject) [Sep. 27th, 2009|03:40 am]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
I don't know why this just popped into my head BUT...on TrueBlood...if a human injests a vampire's blood they form a bond and they can pretty much feel eachother's feelings and whatever right? Like with Sookie & Eric.

So.....if Sophie-Ann (the queen of Louisiana) is having Eric make Lafayette sell her blood as V.....doesn't that mean that she's going to basically have an almost psychic connection with every single human in the south who buys it?

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DD&GG + M 4 eva [Sep. 7th, 2009|03:38 am]
The Frumious Bandersnatch

Dear DirrtyDutch Chocolate Cake & GlamorousGuava CheeseCake,

You're both such naughty naughty cakes and I'm fucking awesome enough to say that I had both of you this evening. And I wasn't even like "Oh Baby, Dutch you're my one and only" and then had Guava when you weren't looking. Hell fuckin' no!

I had you both at the same time! You were even on the same plate together!

And. you. fucking. loved. it. Don't lie. I know you did.
And I'd do it again.

<3 Mike.
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So this is what makes life divine? [Sep. 4th, 2009|12:19 am]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
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USA! USA! [Aug. 18th, 2009|12:46 pm]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
[Current Location |Boerum Hill]
[Current Music |nuttin']

click on map for larger version

Welcome to the United States of America. All 68 of them. Since before the civil war there have proposals for new states, territories, soverign nations and even kingdoms in the US. And this is a nifty map of what the county might look like with all of them as new, individual states. When the proposals were made, some didn't have definite state lines so I'm sure the boundaries are totally off for most of them, but it's still cool to see the general idea.

It's kinda weird to think of Los Angeles not in California, but in a state called Atzlan. That New York City, Philidelphia, and Newark are all in one state called Lenapehoking. That Georgia is split down the center so that Atlanta is now in a new state called Onconee. New Orleans is now in West Florida.

Weird shit. But still...kinda cool.
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...and they have a plan...I think... [Aug. 14th, 2009|12:30 am]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
[Current Location |Boerum Hill]

Soooo....let me get this straight. In the 70's there was a TV show called "Battlestar Galatica". Then in the 00's they made a NEW "Battlestar Galatica" TV show that was a "re-imagination" of the original TV show. And NOW...they've announced that they're going to film a "Battlestar Galatica" movie..........except that it's not going to be based on the original OR the re-imagined TV shows....but a BRAND SPANKIN' NEW re-imagination.

Does this really need to happen?

Maybe the new re-imagination of the show will be, instead of cylons looking like people, they look like giant robot teddy bears and they just want hugs.


Oh...and Brian Singer is directing it, so it can't be worse than X2. ...
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Chubby Sleeping Baby [Aug. 11th, 2009|11:24 pm]
The Frumious Bandersnatch
[Current Music |tori amos - home on the range]

While this is a lovely picture of my nephew Ben, I'm far more entertained by the chubby, sleeping baby to the left.

Oh chubby sleeping baby...I don't know who you are, but you please me.
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